HARPER ANNOUNCES OTTAWA-BC BULLSHIT PIPELINE
(OTTAWA)- Prime Minister Stephen Harper has announced plans for a cross-Canada pipeline to transport unrefined bullshit directly from vast bullshit resources in Ottawa across Canada and directly into British Columbian homes.
The proposed pipeline would take unrefined or “heavy bullshit” from bullshit wells located in the House of Commons, across a northern gateway line to refineries in Edmonton to be mixed with Albertan bullshit, processed and dumped into BC newspapers talk radio and television news.
British Columbians argue against the proposed bullshit pipeline, saying that BC already has its own vast bullshit resources in the Victoria Legislature, Vancouver City Hall, and anywhere Jim Pattison decides to put up a billboard. Ottawa’s bullshit would only flood the market and confuse British Columbians, who would no longer be able to tell where all this bullshit is coming from.
said BC NDP Leader Adrien Dix, ” Call it Western alienation if you like, but if I must drown in warm, runny, steamy bullshit on an hourly basis, I want local bullshit from vegans, cyclists and Canucks fans. Let Harper keep his Eastern bullshit in the house of Commons where it belongs”
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