Dylan Rhymer's State of the Week

(OTTAWA) –Defense Minister Peter MacKay recently defended the use of unmanned aerial drones saying; “Mindless robots with no accountability is what the Conservative Government is all about.”

He added; “If Canadians wanted thinking and liability, they would never have voted in Stephen Harper.”

Critics claim that military drones are brainless machines viewing the world through a cold glass eye with destructive capability impossible to calculate until it’s too late. 

A confused Peter MacKay replied; “Wait, are you talking about the drones or the Conservatives?“

Human rights groups argue that drones are automatons incapable of discretion and lacking the capacity to care about the safety of civilians in pursuit of a single programmed objective. This erodes human culpability to the point of irrelevance.

MacKay stared ahead blankly. “So….you think that’s a bad thing? Weird.”

Mr. Mackay then hinted at practical applications that drones might have in civilian society including replacing police officers, teachers, firefighters and rape crisis councilors. The Tories are even considering running politician drones in the next federal election if it’s legal. “And if it isn’t,” chuckled Mr. Mackay “We’ll just make it legal.”